Search Jokes

View Documentation
A man is walking through the woods and comes across a talking frog ...

"If you kiss me, I'll turn into a princess," the frog tells him.The man picks the frog up and puts her in his pocket."Wait, wait, aren't you going to kiss me?" asks the frog. "I'm a princess!"The man shrugs. "I'd rather have a talking frog."

A man is walking through the woods and comes across a talking frog ...

"If you kiss me, I'll turn into a princess," the frog tells him.The man picks the frog up and puts her in his pocket."Wait, wait, aren't you going to kiss me?" asks the frog. "I'm a princess!"The man shrugs. "I'd rather have a talking frog."

What did a frog say to the other frog on the internet ?

RedditCredit: My 10 yr old Niece.

A childhood classic my dad used to tell me:

Q. Why was a frog flying?A. Because he ate a helium baloon.Q. Then why was a snake flying?A. Because it ate the flying frog.Q. Then why was the eagle flying?A. Because it has wings

A childhood classic my dad used to tell me:

Q. Why was a frog flying?A. Because he ate a helium baloon.Q. Then why was a snake flying?A. Because it ate the flying frog.Q. Then why was the eagle flying?A. Because it has wings

What did the tadpole do when it was being bullied?

It toad its mom. What did the other young frogs say? We should JUMP him and RIBBIT him to shreds. Tadpole? He's more like a tattle-pole.You know what they say, frogs have a hard time holding their tongues.

A chicken walks into a library, and says to the librarian: "Book, book, book"

The librarian hands out three books to the chicken.On the way out the chicken runs into a frog and shows him the books and says: "Book, book, book"The frog replies: "Reddit, reddit, reddit"

What is green and quickly turns red if you push a button?

A frog in a blender

When's a frogs birthday?

February 29th

What's a frog's favorite drug?

Croakaine. Explains why they're hopped up all the time

How do you get red color from green color?

You put frog in mixer

What did the argumentative frog say?

Rebut!

One frog turns to the other and says...

Time's fun when you're having flies!

What happens when a frog parks illegally?

They get toad

What happens when a frog parks illegally?

They get toad

What does an Internet-addicted frog say?

Reddit reddit

What did the biology teacher tell the frog?

Looks aren't everything, it's what inside you that really matters.

What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?

It gets toad away.

What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?

It gets toad.

What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?

It gets toad away

What happens when a frog gets a flat tire?

He gets toad.

Quebec, Canada is currently experiencing record breaking flooding

It's a good thing frogs can swim

I took my three year old for a walk and he started crying because I accidentally stood on a toad stool.

Not sure why he was so upset, I'm the one with frog shit on my shoe.

Why did Kermit The Frog lift off a manhole cover and dive in?

He was kermitting sewercide.

Miss piggy has filed for divorce from Kermit the frog...

...cause Kermit converted to Judaism and can no longer eat pork.

Did you hear about the beer made entirely out of rabbits, frogs and kangaroos?

It’s mostly hops.

I met a baby frog with a great grandfather that cam from Warsaw

He said that made him a tad Pole

Time files when you're having fun

Meanwhile one frog to another, "Times fun when you're having flies"

Old but gold

What is green and smells like pork?Kermit the frog's middle finger

When Kermit the Frogs entertainment career came to an end, he enrolled in seminary school where he was ordained

Now he's a Pastor of Muppets